the scent from the chocolate heart
under her foot
January / February 2011 "heart(s)" Haiku Thread of Sketchbook (Editor's Choice)
Karina Klesko's comment; This puzzles me a bit...is it under-foot as if like a hunter following the prey, or under 'her' foot as it suggests in the first line hazy, unsure, not sure-footed, or broken?
Bernard Gieske's comment: In this next poem by Chen-ou, a peaceful and inviting scene is set up. Nothing unusual is expected except hazy might be a hint of something out of the ordinary. The ending was a surprise and actually increased the power of the scent from the chocolate heart. This happening under her foot was nothing accidental but provoked. Since this involves a heart, there is a story.
Bernard Gieske's comment: In this next poem by Chen-ou, a peaceful and inviting scene is set up. Nothing unusual is expected except hazy might be a hint of something out of the ordinary. The ending was a surprise and actually increased the power of the scent from the chocolate heart. This happening under her foot was nothing accidental but provoked. Since this involves a heart, there is a story.
